Drunken Lullabies
by NeverYouOnlyMe
Summary: IshiRuki. Actually, since you ruined my favorite pajamas and woke me up by screaming 'I'm a pretty pony' outside my window for twenty minutes, I think it is my business.


Ishida Uryuu couldn't believe himself. When Kuchiki Rukia had appeared at his door one night, completely and totally wasted, he'd just stared at her like she was insane. Unfortunately, the fact she'd had way too much to drink was just catching up to her, and she ended up getting sick all over his clothes, doormat, and the carpet near his doorway. After that mess, he decided to take her in after all, and sat her on the couch while he cleaned up the huge mess Rukia'd made, as she sang some drunken song that only made sense to her. A few minutes later, she ended up passing out cold on his couch--by the time he was finished cleaning everything up, she was snoring--and he tossed a blanket atop her with perfect accuracy. More than slightly perturbed by the whole scene, Uryuu decided it was past time for him to go to sleep. As he ascended the stairs, part of him wondered what in the world was going on--he'd never pictured Rukia as a drunkard, personally--and decided to sleep on it--or just ask her in the morning. Well, later in the morning, considering it was already after three. 

! 

Kuchiki Rukia opened her eyes and had the worst headache she'd ever experiences. _Obviously, the Gigai can take a lot less alcohol than I thought..._ She thought, looking around and trying to place her surroundings. She probably ended up at some poor man's house that lived near the Irish pub she'd become rather fond of since Ichigo decided it was time for her to "get her own place", and she'd been pretty much crashing wherever she ended up. Usually, she ended up at Inoue Orihime's apartment, considering the redhead was kind enough to go to the bar around midnight and take Rukia home. However, last night had to be the most intense drinking session--she usually had some idea where she was, and today was a mystery--and she didn't know how much more of this she could take. _Well, from what I remember, last night was a bloody riot.._

Rukia heard something move in another one of the rooms, and decided to, wiht much difficulty, get up and check things out. Her head was pounding, her vision was blurry, and she felt like she might throw up any second. Grasping the side of the couch once she was standing, Rukia started to stagger towards the source of the sound, wishing she had some kindof weapon to arm herself with just in case it was someone who wanted a bit more from her than she wanted to give. She was sure she was safe, though, because if that was the case, they probably would've taken advantage of her when she was unconcious. "...Who's there?" she asked, her voice sounding incredibly loud. 

"...Rukia? You're awake?" a familiar voice that she couldn't place called back, and a familar dark-haired head poked out from behind the door in front of her. "You should probably at least sit back down..." 

"...Uryuu?" she asked, eyes wide. "Oopsie." 

"Don't worry about it," he mumbled, then walked towards her and helped her back to a sitting position. "How are you feeling?" 

"You sure are being nice..." Rukia grumbled, eyebrows raised. 

Uryuu shrugged off her comment. "I suppose it's not every night that a drunken ex-Soul Reaper shows up at my doorstep and vomits all over my belongings." 

Rukia flinched slightly. "Sorry about that." 

"You never answered my question," Uryuu grumbled, evading just how pissed he was about having to clean up Rukia's mess last night. _I don't know why I did it, and I don't know why she's still here._

"I feel like shit," she answered, covering her forehead. "Worst...headache...ever." 

"You have a hangover," Uryuu answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I'll get you some asprin." 

Rukia glared at his back as he stood up, then realized that he had done a huge favor for her. Instead of kicking her out like she would've bet fifty dollars he would when she was sober, he'd taken her in, even after she threw up all over his stuff. And not only that, he let her stay the night--and part of the afternoon, for that matter--without complaining. Well, without complaining much. And now he was getting medicine for her hangover. _Somebody must've cracked him on the head when he wasn't looking..._ Rukia pondered, scratching her head slightly as he returned with three asprin and a glass of icewater. "Thanks," she mumbled as she downed the medicine. 

"Hmph," he grunted, dropping the water on the table in front of her. "So, what's a girl like you doing in a tavern at three in the morning anyway?" 

"...Hmph," Rukia grunted back, glaring slightly. "None of your business." 

"Actually, since you ruined my favorite pajamas and woke me up by screaming 'I'm a pretty pony' outside my window for twenty minutes, I think it _is_ my business," he retorted, showing irritation with her for the first time. 

"Jackass. Fine, fine. I'm...sort of out of a place to live," she answered. 

_Not the answer I expected._ "Ichigo kicked you out?" he asked, recieving a slight nod. "Hmph." 

"He found out that Karin could see me, and Yuzu caught him going through her clothing one too many times. He said it was nothing personal, I just had to find a new place. No big deal," she casually responded, wondering whether the alchohol still had a slight effect on her. For some reason, she never pictured herself speaking freely with Ishida Uryuu as they sat in _his_ house, on _his_ couch. But for some reason, it didn't bother her one bit. 

"...I see. So what, you go out every night, get smashed and go wherever someone takes you? I thought you had more smarts--and common sense to do that. Honestly, Rukia," Uryuu scolded. 

"Usually Orihime takes me home," she responded sheepishly, reaching for the water. 

"So you take advantage of her kindness? What kind of a friend is that?" he admonished. 

"And who are you to lecture anyone about having friends?" Rukia snapped, her fight returning. 

"Go on, take it out on me," Ishida replied sarcastically with a glare. 

"Seriously, have you ever even gone on a date?" she asked, one eyebrow raised. 

"None of your business," he scoffed. 

"You haven't, have you?" she persisted, unsure whether to laugh at him or hug him. _Hug Uryuu? What the hell?_

"I said it's none of your business!" Uryuu shouted, causing Rukia to curl into the fetal position and cover her ears. "You deserved that." 

"You know what you deserve?" Rukia hissed, causing Uryuu to meet her gaze, raising an eyebrow. "You deserve...to go out with me tonight." _Did I just say that out loud? Oh, shit._

"Hmph. No thanks," he scoffed, causing her to glare at him. 

"If you don't say yes, it's time for me to sing the pony song all over again." 

"...Fine." 

Fin 


End file.
